How many persons told you “You’re imperfect, wired for struggle, but worthy of love & belonging.” ? If you ever heard this…you’ve met a whole-hearted person…. and even if you would find it hard to believe, they are embracing vulnerability, not control. Vulnerability is required for any meaningful connection in life.

Listen to this video presenting in 20 minutes  a full 10 years of social work research and its findings about humanity, vulnerability and whole-hearted people.

http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability.html (comments and reactions to the original TED talk can be found here)

A video to watch. More times.
Findings to think about.
A topic to talk about.

What were your revelations after seeing the video?

As much as I would love to think otherwise….I must be vulnerable enough to admit that I am not dealing easy with this whole being vulnerable thing on my personal life…after all….as friendly and open as I am with new friends and acquaintances, when things get to a different level or when things are at a different level of interest from the beginning, that’s how my instinct most of the times makes me to react, that is how it makes me greet “suitors”… 😀 😀

Vulnerability is required for any meaningful connection in life….but most of the times this is how we embrace new connections…we`re trying to keep things under our control….because whatever it`s not under our control is damn scaaaaarrry….and you need a big bad bat to protect yourself from the scarry bad people that want to take away your perfect moment of feeling that you have the control in your life…

The english word courage comes originally from from the French  coeur and Latin cor, both meaning  heart, and the Latin corde, meaning love .  For example,  some Latin saying using these words:

  • Cicero, Div.1,119: “consilium et vita a corde profiscuntur” =The life and intelligence come from the heart;
  • Plautus: “cor habere”= to be wise”;
  • Lucrece: “hebes cor”= poor intelligence;
  • Horace, A.P.98= “cor spectantis tetigisse querella” = to move the heart of spectators.
  • Plautus wrote :” Cor meum”= my love!
  • and  again “corde amare” =to love with passion!

That’s why the original definition of courage is to tell the story of who you are with the whole heart.  So actually you need courage to embrace this vulnerability.  The way to live is with vulnerability, and stop controlling and predicting.

Being a vulnerable whole-hearted person (courage to be imperfect, compassion and being kind to ourselves, connection as a result of authenticity, let go of who you want to be and become who you are,  fully embrace vulnerability and believe that what makes you vulnerable is necessary and makes you beautiful) totally deserves adding it to your 2011 year resolution list.  I’m certainly updating mine 🙂

And I am really curious to know  what were your thoughts, revelations, plans, after seeing this video.