1 year old, 1 year new

Life is an amazing gift when you overcome great obstacles in one’s path, and from end 2009 until end 2010 I had one obstacle after another, one bigger then another… it’s been the most rough year of my life, full of change, full of hopes, and also with luck in the last moment… no moment sooner, but it gave me strength to get myself back up, it saved me until the next obstacle appeared…

I’ve been crazy applying for jobs, hardly breaking my luck this year, this year more then any year in my whole life, I had the biggest financial problems.  Job searching is not producing money….and so many months without one is hard….I had a job proposal via Xing and I believed it was good and this made me come back to Munich in May, but few days after reaching Munich I realized it was a fraud …and I had to restart job searching…. when I finally found a part time job, I’ve had problems receiving a working permit for a part time job from June/July until September, but I finally got it for a place where I loved working because I thought I had friends there beyond employers, because I loved what I had to do and I overworked most of the times without mentioning, and I did it with pleasure mostly because I felt I was working and helping friends and I was also very grateful that they helped me in a moment of need…. and that could go on for 2 years, without any change in the contract …only that I was partially wrong about that friendship thought …  when things got rough, the real thoughts from the other part appeared, and not in a friendly way, so December is the last month of working together. But as it turns out, having a job is what you need to get another job, even without applying …I’ve finally received in Oct a proposal and in Nov a full time job in a company where I went for an interview in February!! (that’s what my dream of moving in a new house was about…and it matched all too well, I feel happy there, I feel at home… but about that in another post)

As I realized too many times this year, things fall apart so that better things can fall together. Life is kinder sometimes then you can ever be with yourself out of too much ethics, gratitude, friendship, respect, trust … only one year and I’ve been thought through rough lessons that I should stop being so altruistic, kind, helpful and trustful with people that don’t deserve it…that I should first see who deserves what and act like it. I’m tougher. I’m stronger. I’m wiser….and I’m still  kind with those few who deserve it.

The last 2 years  changed me a lot, matured me faster then all my previous years, made me see who my real friends are, who stands next to you when you’re in deep shit, who backs up, who is unreachable anymore or who plains stabs you in the back or cuts off your wings,  who’s a person who you can count on in good times and especially in bad times, and who’s only a party and good time friend, who’s a friend and who’s a foe….  Still, I don’t want to give up meeting people, going out etc, I love seeing people, it energizes me to see people happy, gives me energy to do 1001 things, but in the same time, I’ve learned to be more reserved in giving my trust, I’ve learned who to trust and in who to invest my time, I’ve learned not to get so attached of people or things, especially since either them or me are on the road …

I’ve gained friends, I’ve lost “friends”, I was at home in Feb, one week after my new born nephew, Tudor Stefan, brought joy into our family, my sister Cory made me a happy aunt :)).  I’ve missed them tons since May when I last saw them,  but meanwhile this troubled year gave me a new sister, Alexia, or Alexis as I like to tell her, and a new family, a lovely Greek family where I’m living now.

Overall, I see myself wiser, mature but still with a kind open heart of a child despite all the “trusted friends” that made me hurt so bad, I feel blessed, I feel alive, I feel lucky despite having the biggest financial problems of my life,  and most of all, I feel loved, this year more then any year in my whole life, I feel loved.

I’m getting the best out of this troubled year, love, real friends and wisdom, and I’m entering with these in a New Year, decided to turn things career wise and financial wise at the level that I know I deserve.  I’ve got to take my talents and experience more seriously, a short and honest assessment of all of the gifts I can bring to the table will be enough to don’t let free the attitude I’ve had lately of humbly accepting crumbs when I’m worth gold for business.

Happy New Year, welcome into my life!

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